At the edge of the cliff I stand. The golden eagles under the golden sun circle around my head. A black and white vulture watches keenly… waiting, perhaps? The wind is just a whisper, whispering in my ear. I’m so calm… how can it be? I’ve walked down this road a thousand times, a thousand miles, and have never gone beyond this point. This edge… so alluring. If I could, I’d speak a thousand things, a thousand different feelings pouring out all at once.

Smiling, I look over the edge. A thousand feet below, the pellucid water beckons me. It’s high-noon, and yet, the wind is calm and cool, waiting and watching. If you were here with me now, what would you say, what would you do? Everything stands still here, at the edge of the cliff. The eagles seem frozen in a never-ending circular loop, the vultures are still watching impatiently, not moving a muscle. In the distance, somewhere far below, life goes on… but here, by myself, everything is still.

I’ll close my eyes… watch the million faces appear again… all the while knowing, that even among these, I’ll come straight to you… I’ll recognize you by the way my heartbeat changes when I’m near you. I’ll recognize you by my sudden desire to stay alive. You bring a smile to my face. You give me a reason to live… I think I’ll get up and walk away for now, leaving this cliff alone again; maybe I’ll come back here later… maybe with you. Maybe I’ll come alone again, only to stand at the edge of the cliff, and maybe then, the wind will push me harder, and I’ll float off the edge.

He pushes the door hard. It opens and bangs against the wall. The room is dark and silent, quite the opposite of the chaos outside. The storm is clear to see if you walk out the door, into the night. Snow falls hard, with a vengeance, trying to bury you under its silent white fury. The wind is a little less silent. You’d be lucky to be able to hear yourself screaming for help on a night like this, while you hold on to your clothes, hold on to anything to prevent flying away with the wind. Or maybe hold on to your sanity, while you wonder why the Gods have sent this tempest down. Where is this storm? I see it… I see it now. Do you see it?! DO YOU SEE IT?! LOOK NOW! THE SUN IS GONE, NEVER TO RISE AGAIN… are we going to never see the sun again? COME BACK!

And yet, he stands at the doorway. The white light behind him blurring the edges of his silhouette, giving him an errie look, while he stands panting… maybe waiting for his breath to catch up with him… maybe waiting for sanity to catch up with him. But the time for sanity is gone. Now everything is different. Everything must go. Everyone must die… death does not discriminate.

Eyes red… hands shaking… heart pumping… fist rearing… ears ringing… FUCK IT! STOP! STOP IT!

NO!……. what? who are you? Where are you? Where are you in my head?

He walks into the room, not conscious of what he’s doing… A mirror in the corner… there’s a mirror in the corner… I know there’s a mirror in the corner here… I know it’s a mirror… I know… when I turn on the light and look into it, I’ll see a monster… mirror.

You wake up in the morning. It’s too early and too cold to get out of bed. But you get up anyway, switch on the heater, brush your teeth, bathe and get dressed. You eat hurriedly and rush out to get to work. On the way, you sit alone, listening to music on your iPod. You think about how fucked up this life is. You think about how lonely your existence is. What are you doing that you love to do? You’ve been searching for love, and all you’ve found is lust. The days are pointless. The nights are too long, too dark, too damn lonely. Existence is burden. Heart-broken, you find yourself wishing for death, because surely, the afterlife has more to offer.

And then suddenly, you smile. Everybody’s watching.

Buy yourself a day of freedom.
Pay in kind.
Give away your work, worry and responsibility.
Forget your family.
Forget your God.
Buy yourself a day of freedom.
Take off your shoes and walk on wet grass.
Plug in your earphones and drown out the other sounds.
Smile as the sun rises or sets in the distance.
Buy yourself a day of freedom.
The road is yours for the taking.
Set your engine free…
… set your mind free.